Healing on Your to Self-Love
With summer comes a seasonal wardrobe swap that can spark more dread than excitement in most. From weddings with slinky silk bridesmaid dresses you really wish you didn’t have to wear, to sweltering days at the beach that call for next to nothing bathing suits, your body is certainly on display more than it is the other 7 months of the year.
If we think about the change in weather logically – especially considering the sweltering mood swings Mother Earth throws our way – it’s actually quite a gift to be able to treat yourself and your body to less clothing so you can in turn sweat, chafe, and fuss less. The part of the gift most people wish they could return? The insecurities that start to rear their ugly heads.
Show me someone who doesn’t have a single insecurity about themselves and I’ll show you someone who’s lying to themselves.
Because truth be told, it’s absolutely normal to have insecurities. It’s human nature. Hell, even Kim Kardashian has little parts about herself she wishes she could change or hasn’t come to accept yet (even with all the money in the world). But the difference between having insecurities and accepting to love those insecurities is what will make your life a whole lot easier in not only bikini season, but all year round.
One of the most common DMs I get is asking me whether I have anything I’m insecure about. Spoiler alert: of course! I’m human. There’s such a misconception that people who have a large audience on social media – showing their face and talking to thousands of strangers everyday – never struggle with their confidence levels or feeling secure. Well let me tell you: whether it’s my body not looking the way other fitness trainers do or the way my curves stay put no matter what, there will always be parts of me that I focus a little too much on.
So when I’m focusing on the parts that cause me to second guess my confidence, I have to remind myself that these are the parts of me that maybe need a little extra loving, not judgement.
Here are the steps I take to regroup, reset, and remind myself that every inch of me is worth loving. No matter what I’m wearing.
Take inventory of what your mind is obsessing over and look at each thing with a growth mindset. What you think of yourself today is definitely not what you have to think of yourself in two weeks, months, years. It’s all about acknowledging where you are and where you can go from there. Be honest with yourself and work to overcome what’s bringing you down.
This one is so important! Look in the mirror and practice gratitude. Not for your meal, or your friends and family, or your killer condo (ok, those too), but really focus on being grateful for all things you! Everything that makes you uniquely you is so special and deserves to be celebrated. You only have one body in this life; be grateful for it.
Confront and validate your feelings in the moment so you can move past them and dive into that growth mindset aspect of the process. Why do you feel the way you do about your legs or arms? Is it because your social media feed is full of retouched models? Maybe you don’t need to follow them anymore. Fill your life with people who will make you feel good about being you!
Promise me you’ll do this one? Wake up every morning and tell yourself you love you. Nobody has to know you have this cheesy little routine each time you wake up, but trust me, your confidence will know – and skyrocket for it!
If there’s one thing I wish I could shout from the rooftops, it’s that I’m insecure too. My confidence flutters, my energy ebbs and flows, and all I can do is work on myself day in and day out to get to where I want to be. Remember: there’s no such thing as perfection. There’s only feeling comfortable in your own skin and owning who you are that will make you look at yourself differently; with more grace in your eyes and love in your heart.
If I want to show up for you guys as the best version of me, I have to continue to work on being the best version of me. That might look different for everyone, but for me it means facing what’s bringing me down head on, recognizing where these negative thoughts are coming from, and working to overcome them.
Because at the end of the day, I know that’ll make me a happier, more fulfilled version of me.